Star Ford

Essays on lots of things since 1989.

How to control your children

on 2013 January 14

This essay is about parenting, power and control, about how to be comfortable exerting power over your child, and about knowing why and when and how to do it. It’s mainly about autistic children.

Everyone wants their child to be happy and successful, and I am assuming that is our common basis for what we do with our children. But there are some myths and fantasies about the nature of happiness and success that can get in the way.

This article has been published in a new location.


3 responses to “How to control your children

  1. Thank you! For the “joyful middle” especially.

  2. Sharon says:

    Great post, Ian.

  3. dennis says:

    Important: the word ‘Normal’ comes from Latin ‘Norma’, Greek Gnomon – meaning a carpenter’s square – in short, a standard of comparison by which variable items are first compared to (and implicitly corrected by). As it is ‘the standard’, it is not a range, but a single exact value; not a goal, but perfection embodied.

    The reason Normdom uses ‘Normal’ the way it does is that each and every Normie thinks him/herself to be that same perfect example. (this is one of the ways ‘flattery a la Carnegie, “make friends and influence peole”, works). The nature of ‘reloaded perception’ is that is puts a pretty face (by interception and substitution of reality) upon the true nature of social reality.

    A final clue: one of the other names for social intelligence is *Machiavellian* intelligence – and since deception and manipulation is the currency of such social gamesmanship – it is necessary to first ***game oneself*** before one can successfully game others. Normdom’s self-deception regarding being perfect (by istinct) is a necessary portion of its eternal strife in quest of social rank’.

    I suspect you know this better than I do. How can you paint such an (at first) innocuous-seeming picture of ‘the war of all against all’ (in the book) while dealing with the sense of dealing with such unspeakable ‘evil’? I hope the answer isn’t ‘but it’s not evil; it’s just the way Normies are’.

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